The story goes like this…
New student (young adult) at a new school. New campus is a high school. New student has a bad habit of opening the door and running. Where? Student doesn’t know, he just runs. Problem? New school is an open high school campus. Why is that a problem… student can run into the streets… and he did! Now, before we condemn and judge the current teaching staff, let’s look at how we got here in the first place!
What teaching staff learned was that this student came from a closed campus charter school where he was allowed to just leave the classroom and run. The teaching staff allowed it for two reasons. The first was because the campus was closed (fenced in), the student couldn’t “go nowhere” and was safe. The second reason was it was easier to allow him to come and go as he pleased then for them to deal with his behaviors. By engaging in this practice, the teaching staff taught this student two things… one, that it is okay to open a door, any door, and leave when he wanted too! And two, that it was okay to come and go as he pleases!
Fast forward, we have a young man in a new school environment where this behavior is not only unsafe, but extremely dangerous. And, he is a handful for his mother at home, because he wants to open the door and come and go as he sees fit. It’s just not okay!!!
I understand behaviors can be extremely difficult to deal with. I have had my fair share of 30+ years of dealing with behaviors. Unlike some teachers who shy away from dealing with student behaviors, or ignore them altogether because they don’t want to deal with them, I didn’t. I suppose I was a gluten for punishment! I didn’t shy away, ignore, or hoped it would get better. I tackled them head on. I didn’t placate the student, or the family, nor dd I make it easy.
I understood that how I dealt with behaviors now… was laying a foundation for later! Yes, it would be much easier to let six-year-old “R” run around because that’s what he wanted to do. And yes, it’s much easier to let him run around then deal with screaming, kicking, hitting behaviors. But, what happens when “R” turns 10… 15… 20? Dealing with behaviors should always have the end in mind!
So, the next time you are faced with difficult behaviors, don’t give in to what is easy… that’s just not okay! Give in to what is going to lay a solid foundation for later. Give in to what is going to be hard! In the end, it is so well worth it for the student and his/her family!