It had been a long week and Friday was not looking to be any better then the rest of the week had been. Our little girl, a very strong-willed Diana, had been giving us grief about toileting, but this particular week had been the worst she had ever been. One minute, she is cooperating, and getting on her potty like an angel. The very next toileting session, she is dropping to the ground, kicking and screaming and fighting us. I don’t believe in power struggles, but I also knew that giving in to her would work against us and not for us. Because we toilet three times per day, the idea of taking Diana to the potty was really beginning to wear on us. The thought of giving in to her was starting to look pretty tempting.
Waiting her out, hoping she would become cooperative, wasn’t working. Letting her go to the potty with her favorite toys wasn’t working. Rewarding her with her favorite activities wasn’t working. Bribing her with special treats wasn’t working. Letting her choose a potty chair wasn’t working. Nothing had changed about her routine; same times per day, same potty-chair. Nothing had changed with her physically as well. She wasn’t sick and still physically fit. There wasn’t even a particular time of day this happened. So, we were really puzzled as to why her behaviors towards toileting had become so bizarre.
This particular Friday had been no different. The first toileting was a good one for my girl. She went to the bathroom, helped with getting on the potty, and helped with getting off. But, the second toileting! Well, lets just say, it was a war. So, here we are, preparing for the last toileting of the day. My para-ed, goes up to Diana, shows her her schedule, and tells her its time to go potty. She takes the potty picture and goes in the opposite direction. I tell Diana to listen to her teacher and go to the bathroom. She cuts me a look, but heads to the bathroom… and the war begins.
In the bathroom, I can hear Diana fighting with her teacher. “OK, you just stand there until you’re ready to get on.” And the waiting game begins. Unfortunately for us, Diana is a good waiter! Five minutes pass, and there she stands, in the same spot. Ten minutes pass, and she hasn’t budged. Fifteen minutes, and Diana still hasn’t moved from her spot. Now, it is almost time to go, and she is still refusing to get on. So, I go into the bathroom to get Diana on the potty. I see her standing in the same spot as I walk into the bathroom. Not so much to ask her, but thinking out loud, I say, “OK, little girl, are we going to do this the easy way or the hard way.”
Right on cue, Diana answers my question. She ever so gracefully falls back hitting the ground, legs straight up in the air. I guess it’s going to be the hard way!